|Character/s in the cover||Kyoko Mogami, Ren Tsuruga, Kanae Kotonami, Saena Mogami and Susumu Todoh|
|Original Release||January 20, 2016|
Endless Despair is the 232nd chapter of the Skip Beat! manga series.
Kanae sees Ren and Yashiro at her shoot and wonders why they look so upset... Meanwhile, back at Kyoko and Saena's conversation, it seems like Kyoko finally heard her mother's side of the story. Now that she knows more about her mother's awful past and her own birth, what does she decide to do now?
Chapter SummaryRen and Yashiro both looks very troubled. Kanae looks at them, kind of surprised and thinks that something terrible must've happened because they're holding their heads. She then muses that the both of them looks like a parody of a popular Japanese variety show. Kanae thinks that Ren seems to be the type of person to overcome troubles easily. She thinks it might not be his own troubles, but instead, someone else's. She instantly thought of Kyoko but reminds herself not to jump on any conclusions.
Kanae continues that she still suspects Ren is in love with Kyoko, recalling Kyoko's PV with Sho and his gift for her birthday. Kanae then concludes it is not related to romance. She thinks of what could’ve happened to Kyoko that made Ren and Yashiro hold their faces in dismay… she then remembers Saena’s TV appearance where she remarked that she does not have a child.
Kanae wonders if it was related to Saena’s remark. She wonders if Kyoko knew of the broadcast and Ren knew what happened with her after that.
Kanae concludes that Ren would’ve known which made her face a bit statue-like. Shesays that it was something she was too scared to ask about and wonders why Ren knows and how it happened. She thinks it is very strange, just like what she has suspected. Her thoughts were interrupted when her name was called out by Hiou.
Kanae looks away from Ren and turned to Hiou. He asked her what she was doing and tells her to hurry up before the old man comes. Kanae says he’s right and she should hurry. Kanae starts to run but Hiou tells her not to. When Kanae was gone, Hiou turns around to see what Kanae was looking at before. He instantly recognizes Ren.Hiou then remembers Kanae was staring intensely on Ren’s direction and thinks if Kanae like a guy like Ren, which is the guy that the rest of the world fangirls about. He thinks that the fangirl criteria is definitely “Adult, Handsome, Tall”. Hiou thinks that with little effort, being “handsome” is no problem and he can do it. But he doesn’t know about the “tallness” criteria and asks how tall could someone get. He remarks that Ren could be a monster or something. A film crew calls over Ren and tells him that everything was ready. Ren and Yashiro both walk to the shooting area. Yashiro asks Ren how it went. Ren replies that Kyoko did not answer and truthfully, he wasn’t expecting her to. He says that her voice message was not letting him leave a message so he messaged her via text. This kind of surprised Yashiro and says that it was interesting because he knew that Ren was against about texting because it’s annoying and tedious. He then continues that considering the situation, he would definitely break his unbreakable rule. Ren insists that it’s not like that rule was unbreakable, he continues to say that he is really soft and flexible like a fugashi candy. Yashiro doesn’t know if he should believe him or not. Saena says that she was emotionally stressed during that period in her life. Day by day, she hardly slept and ate anything. In fact, she didn’t even realize she was pregnant until after 5 months. She says that under law, 5 months is very close to the threshold for which abortions are allowed. She starts to say something, but knits her brows and looks away. Kyoko looks at her and tells her to go ahead and not to hold back. Saena was a bit surprised and looked at Kyoko. She clenched her hands together before continuing. Saena says that in her eyes, Kyoko is the symbol of her disgrace and shame and for her, that’s all she could ever be. She says that is the reason why it is impossible for her to properly and carefully raise the life that was born within her. She would not be able to do it. She continues to say that she knew Kyoko was a living being, an irreplaceable existence but to hold or touch her, to envision her self loving her – she couldn’t do it because she didn’t have the confidence to do so. Saena tell Kyoko that as her pregnancy progressed, she found less and less hospitals willing to help her. She mentions that her health and mind were already in a bad state so it was even riskier for her. It went on and on until the legal time passed so she had no choice left but to give birth to her. Meanwhile, Kyoko thinks that it is not unexpected that Saena made the difficult decision to give birth, considering her state of mind at that time. Kyoko replied that it would sound strange coming from her but Saena did well with caring for her inside her belly, with coping with everything. Saena looks at Kyoko with an unreadable look then looks away.
The scene changes to Todoh answering a client’s call. After the call ended, he looked up, put his hand on his chin and mumbles. He then stood up and goes to Saena and Kyoko. Todoh calls Saena and asks her if she has a minute. Saena asks what is it. Todoh then tells her to take a call since there is a small problem regarding a client’s case. Todou explains more about the task. Saena says she understands and walks away.
Todoh walks inside the room and apologizes to Kyoko for taking Saena away. Kyoko stands up, looks at Todoh and bows to him. Kyoko says that her life was taken care and protected by many people, which she did not know until that moment. Todoh says that it seems like her and Saena have talked a lot. He says that Saena’s condition at that time was very unstable and as her colleague, he felt like Saena acted too impulsive and did many unforgivable things. He says that it’s okay if Kyoko refuses to forgive Saena but he prefers Kyoko to still try and understand her.Kyoko remembers what she and Saena talked about earlier. Saena says that she could not handle it – placing romance over her work. She then says that Katagiri and her client suffered a lot because of her. All in all, Saena says she didn’t like the fact that the awful part of her past was going to be born into the world.
The scene turns back to Kyoko and Todoh.Kyoko smiles a bit and says she knows what it feels like… to be foolishly in love and turn into an idiot. She says she went through the same thing once so she understands how Saena must’ve felt. Kyoko also says that even though she went through the same thing, her own experience was nothing compared to Saena because hers was trivial and unbelievably stupid, both the guy and the experience.
Kyoko recalls what Saena told her earlier again. Saena remarks that she had little to no pride left. She had no will to break the law or continue living the way she was so together with Kyoko who was inside her, she considered suicide.Todoh says that information travels fast. People heard all kind of things and put all of it together, the real reason about Katagiri’s failure. Todoh continues to say that Saena was not allowed to work at that time which is also why she decided to make those rash decisions. He also says that both her and Saena made it miraculously safely but after her birth, Saena was in a condition where she could not be left alone. He continues to say something about Katagiri not being able to just stand and watch but Kyoko tried to finish what he was saying. Kyoko says that Katagiri must’ve started his own law firm and invited Saena. She says that Saena told her that Katagiri’s graciousness restored her little pride and therefore remained her will to continue living.
Kyoko says that it seemed like Katagiri took care of her not only when she was a child, but also even before she was born. She asks Todoh if it was possible to meet up with him, even though she heard he has not been feeling well. Todoh just stares at her. Kyoko wonders if he’s saying no. She asks him if there was something wrong with what she just said.Todoh said that almost of what Kyoko said was correasct. Kyoko asks what little part was off. Todoh tells Kyoko that the firm Katagiri actually started was the predecessor to the one they’re currently in and Katagiri also had to bully Saena in order to join the firm. He recalls what Katagiri said to Saena. Kyoko thinks that it is not what she imagined because she expected it to be a more tender scene. Todoh then says that Katagiri had to say it that way because she started the firm just for Saena’s sake. He continues to say that Katagiri did not say that outright and he also did not have a firm to go back even though he apparently had an offer to work at an old friend’s firm. Todoh says that he’s pretty sure Katagiri turned down the offer for Saena’s sake.
Kyoko looks openly touched at what Katagiri has done and thinks “Crocodile-sensei!”. Todoh smiles a bit at Kyoko and says that she is very open minded and tolerant. Usually, one would not be able to sympathize with Saena’s case and no one could blame anyone for it. Todoh continues to say that if it were from Kyoko’s view as a child, Saena’s actions must’ve been unreasonable because she did not know the reasons why she was acting that why. But in Saena’s mind, Kyoko was a certain piece of her so as long as she kept thinking like that, the situation was not going to change. And of course, it has not changed up until to this day.Todoh continues to say that even though he asked Kyoko to try and get to know Saena, it was a very difficult thing to do. Kyoko smiles a bit in response. Kyoko says that if it was her from the past, that kind of thing would’ve been impossible. Todoh then asks if she could forgive Saena. The person in question actually just opened the door and started walking towards the two, hearing Kyoko’s answer.
Kyoko says that since she was young, it was her dream to be praised by her. To be told she did her best and be patted at her head. She said that she thought that if she did well on everything Saena wanted, then her dream would come true. One day for sure, she hoped to be accepted by Saena with a kind and accepting smile.
Kyoko continues to say that after finally hearing Saena’s side, she made up her decision. She says that she really is going to give up on giving up on her desire to be loved by Saena. Kyoko will still attempt to make Saena accept her as a daughter.
Characters in Order of Appearance